The Familyman’s New-Homeschooler Guide to Success

If you’re a new homeschooler (and there are a lot of you out there), then this “Welcome to the Community” letter is long overdue. I’ve been thinking about you for the last couple of days. That is, ever since my wife got back from a homeschool meeting a couple days ago.

Even though we travel the country encouraging homeschoolers, my wife has been feeling the need to get more involved in the local homeschool community. So she loaded up the minivan with our three youngest and drove to the next town over for a homeschool group meeting.

That night as we lay in bed, I began the debriefing. So how was it? What were they like? Did the kids have fun? Did they act like wild animals? Did you meet anyone that you clicked with? We talked for a while in the darkness, but the one thing I’ve been thinking about ever since was her statement: “They’re almost all new homeschoolers…and their reasons for homeschooling are different than ours were.

What she described were a bunch of moms who pulled some of their kids out of the public school figuring homeschooling was a better option for a particular child. They didn’t have deep convictions about it or a strong calling from God…they just thought homeschooling looked like a pretty good option on the smorgasbord of school options.

Maybe you find yourself in the same place…or are not quite sure how to approach this homeschool beast or where to begin. So I thought I’d reach into my homeschool encouragement bag and pull out The Familyman’s New-Homeschooler Guide to Success.

No matter what brought you to the point of deciding to homeschool your children, you have chosen the best. It’s certainly not the easiest, but it is the best. Because of the constraints of time and space, let me divide all my wisdom into two categories – Dos and Don’ts.

Let’s start with some Don’ts:

1. Don’t use the school system as your model – Even if you could replicate the entire school corporation in your home, it wouldn’t work (it doesn’t even work for them). So throw the idea of doing school from 8:30 – 3:30 out the window. In a school setting, much of the time is wasted and used to corral kids. You don’t need that much time. With most kids, you’ll be done by lunch, leaving the afternoon for fun, exploring, and REAL learning.
2. Don’t pay attention to grades – Here’s the deal: a long time ago some school experts decided that the way to assess a classroom of students was to give them a letter grade. The problem with that is it doesn’t work. Grades mainly measure how good kids are at taking tests. I was good at taking tests, but that certainly did not measure what I knew or had learned. If you don’t have to keep grades…don’t. If you have to keep them…don’t show your kids and try to keep from looking at them yourself. It’s not an accurate measure of anything.
3. Don’t overdo it – I can’t tell you how many homeschool moms have come up to me exhausted, discouraged, and feeling beaten. They often go on to tell me that their oldest child is FOUR. If you want to ruin learning, start formal, structured school early and push hard. 

Instead, let your young children have fun and dabble their feet in school. Even this week, my wife let our seven-year-old KEEP playing instead of doing his math lesson. You know what? He learned MORE using his imagination to play with Playmobil than he did if she had made him do some math problems.

1. Don’t worry about the gaps – Everyone has gaps…and the great thing about gaps is that God fills them. Believe me, you can’t ruin your children if they enjoy learning.

Now for some Do’s:

1. Do make school part of life – Go ahead and get the books, workbooks, and curriculum, but let it ebb and flow with your life. Right now, my wife is off with our three youngest at a recycling plant. Sometimes they go to swimming lessons or play games with an elderly lady. She doesn’t ADD those things to her homeschooling day; they are PART of her homeschooling day. Go with the flow and realize that they’re learning in ALL those settings.

2. Do smile often – A lot of homeschooling moms (and moms in general) have quit smiling. They keep their eye on the schedule and then see their schedule-ruining children as the enemy. Hey, if you’re not smiling…then something is out of whack.

3. Do enjoy your children – Mom if you get to the end of your homeschooling year and have ONLY taught them a bunch of stuff, I believe you will have failed. The point of homeschooling is to enjoy and train your children at home while you prepare them for life in the future. 

4. Do know that your children are better off being homeschooled by you at home – Oh, I know you already don’t believe that one, but it is true. Home is the best place for your children and you are the best teacher for them. You know your children better than anyone else…and God gave your children exactly the mom they needed.

OK, so print this page out and hold onto it, Mom. You are so blessed to be able to homeschool your children. Glad you’re part of the homeschooling team.

Oh, and don’t forget to smile!