Let Brain Binky Turn Your Ordinary Child Into Something Special

Senior Reporter TSH Herald – Dot Nosliw

According to igenius CEO, Harv Needleman, Brain Binky has the potential to raise a child’s IQ by over 45 points. “This is a break through in early development education, and the implication is mind blowing,” Needleman says. “We achieve this by harnessing the power of the Binky.”

The Brain Binky is outfitted with proprietary software and hardware that sends educational stimulants directly to the baby as they suck on the pacifier giving control to the “sucker” as well as the parent.

“Parents set the level of achievement they desire in their children and then the Brain Binky takes over,” Needleman says. “So for example, say you want your child to attend an Ivy league school when he matures. You simply type in the simple code into the Binky and the Binky takes it from there.”

According to the owners guide (which is included with the purchase) the infant should begin wearing the BB within hours of birth and continue to do so until the normal weaning process. While the child sucks the BB, it plays classical music, whale songs, and pre-recorded college lectures. As the child ages the lectures may even be live streamed.

“The beauty of it,” adds Needleman, “Is that the child can adjust the information according to the intensity of his/her sucking. If the BB senses a slow down it might adjust from playing nature sounds to something more stimulating…like a reading of the periodic elements. If the child is sucking vigorously as he listens to a lecture on Music Theory, the BB will then follow up that with a recorded interview with a famous conductor or a biography of an Italian composer.”

When questioned about the weight of the headphones, Needleman answers, “They might seem a little awkward at first, but we’ve found that most children adapt pretty quickly.”

Needleman later adds that a womb version is being tested now that will plug directly into the mother’s navel. “We’re calling it the BBB.”

Teresa Mint, whose child, “Hunter” has been using the Brain Binky for over six months sings it’s praises, “We’ve already seen many exciting signs and no longer fear that our child might grow up to work in a factory, restaurant, or drive for Uber. Instead we have high hopes that Hunter will one day be a Neurosurgeon, a playwright, or maybe even a Hollywood trainer.”

Needleman has the last word, “With Brain Binky…no child has to be normal.”